Xin Ru Dao Ge

Relaxing Saturday...phy mock test in the morning was optional...feels really good cos it's not a like the usual taxing tests.Was really glad to see him...and i actually sat directly behind him.I dint forget wat i said la...i noe tt in order to protect myself frm getting hurt again i hafta be firm...so i always remind myself to draw back.Just watched Tian Di Nan Er...the girl was deeply hurt in her previous relationship...so she became v worried when she see tt her present bf is hafing contact wif his ex again.The guy clarified and asked the girl y did she haf so little confidence in him...the girl said tt it's not him...she didn't haf confidence in herself.She was hurt once and she is afraid tt the same thing will happen again.This is very true...i guess when someone is hurt once...it'll really affect her self esteem and when the next relationship comes..she'll tend to be very cautious and sometimes seem to be overly sensitive.In this case getting jealous is normal and i really dun think this is being possessive.For me,i really dunno how low my self esteem shud fall until i find e right person.Feeling very pessimistic about love right now.My papa told me a lot in the evening when my mama was away.Then i notice how much discontentment there can be in a marraige.I dunno since when i had this phobia for divorce...can't imagine how will things be if i haf to live in a single parent family.My papa tell me tt if i were to choose...i hafta be really careful cos choosing a lifetime partner is sth of great significance in life.I can't describe how bad i felt when he told me all those...i was originally eating my dinner but at tt pt i can't even swallow...trying hard to hold back my tears.Why is this world so practical?No room for dreams nor fairy tales.I dun like escapism but sometimes i really wish to get away frm reality so tt at least i can haf a few moments to breath.Right now,i just pray tt all will turn out fine.